TRANSCRIPTION
How old were you when you started working?
I was about ten years old. I was told to work. Papa did not ask he told us what to do and when. In May we would do cotton and corn we cleaned all the weeds from the plants. All of my brothers would work too. Our hands were so sore and cut. our hands look so ugly. Then on July thru Sept. we picked the cotton and in Oct. we picked the corn. In November we picked pecans. It was sooo cold! All I can remember was being cold all the time!
Was there any discrimination towards your family based on your Mexican heritage? If so, in what way?
No, the Anglo people that we worked for were really good people towards us. They gave us fruits and clothes during the holidays. They would bake things for us like pies or cakes, some little nice treats that his wife would make for us. As far as for discrimination, we never saw any of that because we never got out much. We were always at home. But the few Anglos that we did know were good people, they treated us good.
What did your father do for a living?
My father cut wood at a wood mill, he cut wood all year long. But more during the cold months. He would also work out on the fields us too. My father worked a lot all year round my father was working and saving money. We were so young we never saw any of the money that we made while working out in the fields. We were lucky if we even got a new pair of shoes which of course hardly ever happened. Sometimes we knew that papa was a drinker because we would hear him come home drunk, and he was pretty mean to us. "may his soul rest in heaven" but he was pretty mean to us and to my poor mama. He was a hard working man, that he was but he was also not a very good father to us.
Do any memories stand out as a child?
Yes I remember when my siblings were born how scared we would get to hear our mother in so much pain, especially scared because we weren't allowed to ask any questions at all. We knew better to keep quiet and talk amongst ourselves than to ask an adult. That is one thing that makes me feel good about today's generation that our kids can communicate and talk to their parents about almost anything. Back then that was not allowed, you could not talk if another adult was present or if your parents were talking, you had to wait until your mom was alone or whisper something to her if papa was there in the room with us. Our house was so small that we never had any type of privacy.
Did your parents own a car? How did they buy it?
At first no we had a horse and wagon. We would visit our nearest relatives in our wagon, that was always fun. Except you had to be quick because there was so many of us that if you didn't run to the wagon you would stay behind and end up having to get supper ready. I usually stayed behind because i knew that my younger siblings wanted to go too. So I would let them go instead of me. When I was about ten years old my papa brought a car, I don't remember what kind it was I just know we had a car. I'm sure my papa brought the car cash because he had a lot of money saved up. There was so many of us working that it was natural that papa brought the car cash.
When you were sick did you see a doctor? If not how were you treated for any illnesses that your family came across?
No we never saw any doctors because we didn't have money to spend on them. My mama would give us children's Bayer aspirin for EVERYTHING! We would also drink a lot of tea's, like Chamomile or Yerba Buena, Te'de anise all kinds of tea. All these were tea's that we grew in our own yard. Mama would send us outside to grab a handful of tea leaves then we would boil and drink. It always helped us with stomach aches too.
Who delivered your siblings?
Usually it was my mother's mother- in- law (mi abuelita). When I was born the midwife that delivered me was a colored lady, that's what I was told, she also delivered some of my younger siblings, I don't know what they paid her or how just that she delivered me and my siblings. Usually my grandmother then my mother would deliver the children and so on. But by the late 1950's we did see our own doctors to deliver our babies.
Is there any particular funny memory you would like to share?
Well this is not very funny but then again we didn't have big imaginations like kids do now a days. Me and my sister Lola would pretend that when our uncles or aunts came over to our house and invite us to go to town with them that they would wait for us to get ready. we would pretend that we would look in our closets for the prettiest long dresses and beautiful shoes, and that we were already wearing pretty long dresses, ha-ha my mom laughs... That was fun for me and my sister, we didn't know anything else to do except wish for beautiful things that was about as far as our imaginations went. Also another time my brothers and sisters went into town for ice cream which was very rare. I was sick that day, I was very young about 12 years old and I remember my aunt telling my mother that what I had was high blood pressure, I was always sick from that but only went to see the doctor for it maybe once or twice. Well as I was saying my siblings went to get ice cream and my sister Tomasa told me that she had saved some of her ice cream and put a tiny little bit of ice cream on my lips while I was sleeping, so when I woke up I would taste it on my lips. She felt bad that I didn't get to go, and that, that was a rare treat for us back then. My sister passed of breast cancer at a very young age and I will never forget what she did for me that day.
Is there a sad memory you would like to share?
Yes there are a lot of those but this one was really hard on all of us. When my twin brothers were born I was about eight years old. My twin brothers were 11 months old. As I mentioned before we weren't allowed to talk very much, but that didn't mean that we weren't allowed to listen. I heard that my abuelito on my father's side did the EL MAL DE OJO. Meaning the evil eye. Well back then in those times it meant that if you saw something that caught your attention you had to touch it real good, or something bad could or would happen to either that person, or yourself, depending on how strong your evil eye was. Well my grandfather saw my little twin brothers playing outside and he only touched one of them and not the other, that same night my brother Daniel got really sick he had a really high fever and mama already knew that my grandfather had not touched him, so she sent my oldest brother to my grandfather's house to tell him to come over and touch my little brother because he was very sick and my grandmother said that no, she could not bother him because he was sleeping. "Lastima" sadly my little brother passed away that same night. No one ever told my grandfather anything about what had happened, I think my mama was also in some ways like us when we were little she also couldn't say very much either. We were all very sad about that, it was really hard on me. (My mom then looks at me with tears in her beautiful brown eyes and we cry for a little while, just me and her...)
When you would cut yourself and needed stitches what remedies would your mother or father give you if there was no doctor?
Well they would get the oil from the lamps and dip spider webs in it then they would open the cut and pack it with the webs and that would work almost like a band-aid. we would put them on every so often to stop the bleeding and it worked!
How did you know when there was a bad storm coming, or floodings? How did you receive your information, any local events that stand out?
Well we did not own a radio, we received all of our information from a rancher nearby. He would come over and tell papa about the weather. Although we always knew just by being outside, we knew if it was going to rain and how bad. My papas Anglo friend kept us informed about the depression too, we did not understand what that meant but we knew that it wasn't a good thing because we would hear my mother and father talk about it and they sounded worried. I would hear my papa saying things like how everything was going to get worst for us, how it was going to affect our money situation.
Did you ever trade any livestock for other types of necessities?
We had pigs, turkeys, a couple of cows and lots of chickens. We only sold the turkeys for money. The pigs my father would make chorizo, pork skins, and other types of foods to eat. Only on special holidays my papa would cook a whole pig and my mama would make all kinds of sides. That was the only time that we would eat something other than rice and beans. It wasn't very often that we would have meat on the table, every animal we raised was for our own personal use except the turkeys, those we sold.
What was a Christmas like in your house back then?
It was good, we didn't have any gifts or new clothes but we had each other, my mama would make me and my sisters little dollies, she would use old clothes and stuff the dolls with old rags and paint eyes on them, they were really pretty, we loved playing with them. We made a nice dinner and the older women would make bunuelos and tamales, those were the best things to eat when its cold outside! My parents would also buy candy for each and every one of us. That was a real treat.
Did you ever attend school?
Oh no, I was not allowed to go to school, I worked instead out in the fields, My younger brothers and sisters were allowed to attend school but not me and my older siblings. I wanted to go to school because I would see my siblings and cousins walk to school or talk about it and I wanted to go too. My mama asked my father one time if I could go to school and he would say no that I was needed here at home and out in the fields.
Did you ever attend any dances?
Yes we did not often but every few months a rancher nearby would have a party and invite us to attend, or there were these dance halls where our mama would take us to. It was me and my older sisters and brothers that went to the dances. We would dance with boys all night long, that was so much fun! But we were not allowed to go outside or be with the boy by ourselves. My aunts had very good eyes they could see if one of us was missing right away, ha-ha, although we never tried to do anything wrong we just wanted to dance with boys and laugh and have fun.
When you married Teodoro in 1957 why did you move to San Antonio, Texas?
We moved to San Antonio because he had a good job working out in the fields, there was a lot of work here in San Antonio, unlike in the ranch there was too many people working the fields there already. We came to San Antonio with hardly any money, but we managed to save and eventually buy our first house on 124 Arizona Street. To me living in the city was terrifying because I lived all my life n the ranch. I was not used to seeing so many people, so many stores and restaurants and dance halls, I was not comfortable in the city for a long time, But eventually I got used to it and loved living in the city.
Is there anything else you would like to add to this interview?
Si esta entrevista me toco mi corazon mas de lo que yo piensava, oh que quisas otras mujeres de mi edad tambien como yo pasaron las mismas penas. Pero tenemos que recordar que nuestro pasado es nuestro pasado,y ahora nuestra familia es nuestro futuro y eso es lo mas importante de todo. ( Yes this interview touched my heart more than I thought it was. Also that maybe other women my age also suffered the same pain I did, but we have to always remember that our past is the past and our families are our future now and that is the most important thing of all).
ANALYSIS
I learned from this interview that back in the 1920's when my mother was a child,that women did not have the right to make any decisions. The men were the authority at all times. They controlled the money, the children and their spouses.
The main points that I came across during this interview were that females of all ages were not allowed to live outside the box, they did not have the desire to become someone important or someone to be proud of. Women unfortunately did not know any better, they only knew what they were taught. which was to raise their siblings, cook and clean and worst of all to work like grown men.
I did not know how difficult it was growing up in a ranch, un-appreciated, over worked and poor. I never knew how much she suffered as a child. I'm sure yes she did have some good memories but they do not out number in any way shape or form the bad ones.
To change my view on this topic about a womans life growing up in a ranch in the 1920's and with absolutely no education at all. Is for me very heartbreaking, my views did change tremendously. This type of child raising or child abuse is hard to accept and much more difficult to understand when it hits so close to home.
OUR PAST IS ALWAYS OUR FUTURE, NUESTRO PASADO SI ES NUESTRO FUTURO
My mother believes that this was the way that she was supposed to be treated. She never regretted not doing or wishing for better things in her life. Those type of decisions were not important to them. Her way of expressing to me about her life was sad for both of us, many things I was not able to include in her biography because it was just so terribly wrong and cruel, I wish I could have because it is after all a part of our history and a part of our lives but I was not allowed. It saddened me to see, hear and feel my mothers pain during this interview.
The stories that I had the pleasure of writting about my mother are priceless, I have never had a conversation with her about anything as sacred and important as this interview. I was able to visit this place where my mother was born and raised. All with a little patience, plenty of time and most important of all, her memories.
I had no problem with her answers to the questions I asked. I believe that this was an interview that should be based upon facts and actual memories of my mothers childhood. My mother also knew that this interview was very important to the both of us. We were able to share stories that other family members will have the pleasure of reading someday. So I had no reason to attempt or verify any of her answers and stories.
There are many drawbacks, more than benefits because this interview was not a very pleasant one. The past sometimes should just stay as is, It shouldn't be put right in front of us especially if it was a cruel one. But I am very glad and very happy that this interview shed some light on my mothers up-bringing, if at least to better understand why she never learned to read or write. Why she always believed that even after her parents passed and she was living her own life she still couldn't shake off her childhood memory of not being able to achieve, of not being able to reach for a star. Of how in her own quiet way she was never able to let go of her fathers constant reminder that she was not worth much as a child as a teenager or even worse as a woman.
Of course it is an effective way of learning about the past, when or how else would I of ever gotten the priveledge to learn so much about my mother and her life? Every single question she answered just helped me realize that she was serious about this interview and that it was as important to her as it was to me. This biography worked for us, it taught us about how life can be so beautiful and innocent and at the same time be so ugly and cruel. It especially taught me that my mother had so much faith in the Lord that aside from all the hardships she went through as a child she acomplished a way of loving completely and totally with all of her heart and no school education can ever teach you that.
