Ruben D. Robles
Why did you join the Navy instead of another branch of the military?
Because my family was a Navy family. That my dad had been there in the Navy, he had been a Sea Bee, my two brothers had been in the Navy so, I knew I was going to be in the Navy too.
Did you understand the events surrounding the Vietnam war?
At the time I went I thought I did. I thought I was going because we were going to free a people that had been oppressed by communism. That's really what we went to do, but the way they talked about it you got the feeling that at that time communism was coming to the United Sates if we didn't stop them that it would eventually come to our country. So when that was brought to light it just made it more expedient for us to go and that is why I felt like I wanted to go.
Did you feel that the war was needed?
Umm...now in hindsight no, but at the time I did, I did feel that it was necessary. There were a lot of threats from Russia, Russia was helping China, and China was supplying ammunitions and rifles and guns to North Vietnam, North Vietnam was oppressing South Vietnam and at that time I did feel like it was necessary.
Did you feel that the war could have been prevented?
Oh definitely! It definitely could have been prevented. That is if North
Vietnam would have discontinued or retreated and left South Vietnam alone we would not have gone. But they just kept oppressing the people of South Vietnam more and more. I feel that if they would have stopped we wouldn't have needed to be there.
Were you in Vietnam before it was considered a full-fledged war?
No.
How old were you when you arrived in Vietnam?
I arrived on my birthday. On the day that I got there, well actually I think I was 18, while I was on the plane somewhere along the line we passed the time zone and it became the 31st of August, and I went over to Vietnam. When I actually set foot on Vietnam I was 19.
What were your feelings when you arrived?
Fear, the unknown, I had lost many friends already from high school. People that were older than me had already gone over and died, and I was pretty much afraid. I was doing everything I was doing was out of obedience and allegiance to my country. But I was afraid. There was a lot of fear in my heart.
How long were you in Vietnam?
Eleven months.
What was your job during the war?
I was a gunner. I was a gunner but the boat that we were on was a special crew that we had, all the crews that were over there had 11 men, and we each knew each other's job. If I had to get into the engine room, I knew enough about the engines that I could go there and change that C-strainers I could go and clean out the filters change the oil, put oil in it, put gas diesel fuel in the engines if I had to go up to the 20mm cannon I could fire the 20mm cannon, I could fire the 105-Howitzer. We were trained in small arms, throwing grenades, machine guns the 30mm machine gun 50 caliber machine gun I could drive the boat, communicate on the phones, we were taught to do what the other ten men did, I had to do. But as far as my position most of the time I was a loader in the 105 howitzer I would load the 105, that was my station during general quarters.
Did you write home to anybody?
Yes definitely. I didn’t write home as often as they would have liked me to, but I was trying to send home a letter once a week I tried to write to my wife, if I wasn't writing to my wife I was writing to my mom my dad and every once in a while my grandmother would write to me I would answer her. But yeah I tried to write a letter once a week.
What did you miss the most from being away?
My wife had just had a baby, and I didn’t know what the baby looked like. I was only with the baby and my wife 20 days and I was taken away. I left May the 20th 1968. So when I left I didn’t get to see the baby, and it wasn't till the end of my training in August about three months later I was over there June, July, and August, around August 10 or 12 my wife and my mom and dad came over to visit me and they brought the baby. So I was with him for about four or five days off and on because I was still committed to my job my training in the Navy. But when I would get off of work I would go off base and visit with them and little Ruben. I think that probably the baby and my wife I missed the most.
What missions did you go on during the War?
We went through probably over a hundred missions. We would call them operations not missions. During these operations we probably went through 110 or 120 operations that we went through while I was over there. Some of them were a week long some where two days some where just one day just go and come back. we would have an operation where we would have to go pick up soldiers at a certain location, they would give us coordinates and we would take off and you know go along the river to the coordinates that were given to us we would pick up the solders some times we got ambushed some times we didn't. But there were many, many operations that we went on. During these 110 100 operations we went on, we got into 81 fire fights. Into 81 battles. As you read in the report that I have given you, our boat was hit the most from the whole squadron out of all the squadrons our boat was the one that took the most hits. Evidently we had been marked by the enemy, we would be told by the South Vietnamese that they didn't like our boat because our boat was killing a lot of their Vietcong and we would put out such rapid fire from the 105-howizter and the 50mm cannon machine guns that they were upset with us. They were also upset with the flame throwers. There was one boat that had flame throwers. So I know that they had branded us as one of the boats that they wanted to sink.
Was there a time when you thought for sure you were going to die?
I feel like, the time I thought I was going to die was one time when um...the boat when up on the beach and um...I am saying the beach but it was the bank of the river. The rivers over there are very, very narrow. This particular river we were on we could not turn around. That is how narrow it was. We knew that there was about two-mile strip of river where we were going to have to go forward, we couldn't go backwards. There were about 10 boats in the convoy. Usually we would have the mine sweepers in the front of us, we would have communication boat in the middle so we could protect it. That is where the higher ranking officers would be, on that boat. At the end we would have gun ships at different intervals. Boats that had howitzers, flame throwers, 40mm cannons, but this particular time that we went up on the bank we couldn’t turn around. It was a do or die; we had to get through there. We got ambushed it was a huge company of North Vietnamese that hit us. These were regular Army people from North Vietnam. When we got hit they hit the coxswain flat where there was our captain our lieutenant and the driver of the boat in the middle. And they hit the coxswain flat with four B40 rockets. They hit them in a place where the rocket came in and exploded and I believe, but I am not certain to this day we never saw Lieutenant Kelly anymore so I don’t know if he died. I know he was in very bad condition. The reason I know is cause I was in the 105 howitzer loading when the boat hit the bank, and as the boat hit the bank it turned the boat sideways. I remember being very scared, I remember thinking the enemy is going to come up on the boat. Cause now we aren't in the water, we aren't floating, we are sitting on the bank. All they have to do is jump on the deck at start coming through the hatches or start throwing grenades inside the hatches. That really was a fearful time for me, I really thought that this is the end, we would not make it out of there, and we did. We made it out. It was a very hard time. It wasn't easy, I remember the engines roaring trying to come off that bank. We hit that bank hard, the engines the propellers were in the mud, and the boat would not come off. But eventually the boat did come off. Right about the same time that the boat came off the bank they had been calling in for airships, for air support. Right at that time the Navy and the Air Force came through. They just came through like Lone Ranger, like Superman they came through, man you could just hear the gun ships just firing their guns. It was just such a happy moment to know that we were getting help and that we weren't alone, that they knew we were out there, and we were going to be saved. I remember just praying and thanking God that we would make it out of there. If there was a time I thought I was going to die it would have to be that time, that day.
Did you ever feel guilty that you lived when others died?
Oh yes. I think every soldier that comes back from war comes back with that guilt. Why did I come home, why did I make it when others didn't? A lot of why some of the men that are still in Vietnam mentally never came back is because of that. They say that among Vietnam veterans there is a certain look in the eyes of the Vietnam veteran. It’s called the eye of death. Another Vietnam veteran can detect it. I have been stopped by other Vietnam vets that look at me and say you where in Vietnam weren't you? And I would say yes how did you know that? They say you have the look. So I think so, I believe when you look into a man's eyes you can see sometimes, you can see the soberness that some point in his life he was in a time when has had a traumatic experience that will never go away. You are going to live with that for the rest of you life. You can't get that war out of your mind. It will always be there. There are many nights when I awaken wrestling, swinging, hitting, yelling some nights I couldn’t sleep cause I would hear shelling the 105 howitzer going off, grenades, mortar attacks, that another thing when you are over there you are always thinking the next mortar is going to fall in to my pocket. The next mortar is going to hit me right on top of my head. Cause these mortars, they just start firing mortars at you, they are just coming out of the sky like rocks or hail. You just be walking along at the top of the boat, and all of a sudden you start hearing explosions boom, boom. What's going on? Where is this coming from? We're getting mortared. After awhile you get used to the sirens going off. People running for cover. We would have fox holes were people could dive into the fox holes and stay there till the mortar attack was over. But that is another danger, the mortars and the mines. You always worried about the next step, the next step you take, you will step onto a mine. If it's not a bullet hitting you, an AK47 catching a bullet in the head, you thinking maybe a mortar will fall into your pocket, your next step is going to be on top of a mine, a B40 rocket going off in front of you, you just never know, but you are always thinking you are going to die. And after a whole year of this thinking you are going to die, it just eventually stays in your head. I have never lost that feeling. I have always thought I am living on borrowed time. I should have died back in 1968-69.
What are the most vivid memories you have of the War?
There was, I guess, this occasion that I tell you that we almost got it. Overrun by the North Vietnamese Army. The other time I was in the turret and I was firing a 30 caliber machine gun, a B40 rocket came through the bar armor and it was dud, it never went off. When the UDT team came and took the B40 rocket out and disarmed it, they asked who was in this turret, and they said it was Robles, and they said son, if this B40 rocket had gone through the wall, through the bulk head, you would have been cut in half. I remember that often. That and throwing grenades all night long, during the watch. Every night you had to keep watch. We are living on a boat, and somebody has to stay awake. Somebody has to stay awake and watch for the enemy. so we would leave a man awake, for two or three hours, then he would go wake up the next guy and he would stay awake two or three hours, come back wake up the next guy till morning. Then around six in the morning every one would get up, and we would end the watch. We always had a watch. Sometimes during the watch you had to throw grenades into the water. Sometimes all night long you would be sleeping, when you get your turn to sleep you would be down in the bottom, and of course the berthing area where you are sleeping is under the water. So when those concussion grenades would go off, those steel walls in the ship, you just feel the concussion, you feel the vibrations. Every 20 minutes you would hear a grenade go off. So how much sleep do you think we got? That is probably the greatest memory, that and standing watch. There was one night I was standing watch and I was up on top of the coxswain flat, and I almost killed two old people. They were old, old people. I remember it was about two in the morning. In Vietnam there is no lights absolutely no lighting out there. So when you are up at night by yourself, it is very quiet and dark. If you have a good moon, lots of stars, then it helps. That particular night we had probably a half a moon, a little bit of light, and I heard a sanpan coming towards us. Sanpans are little canoe shaped boats that the Vietnamese would use; they had a little motor in the back. I could hear that little thing just sputtering away. I knew what it was. We used to have to stop the sanpans and check them for rifles and ammunitions. I could hear it coming, so when I heard it right away I called to our commander, I said I am on mike 151 I am on mike 1, and there is a sanpan coming on the starboard side, and he said how far is it from us. I said about 200 yards I can hear him. He said keep watching, if he gets too close you are going to have to open fire. We are not in friendly territory here. So the sanpan just kept coming and coming. I called back and said he is about 100 yards away, I can hear him he is getting closer, I can't see him but I can hear him; I figure he is about 100 yards away from us. He just kept coming. All of a sudden I see the little sanpan coming. I call back the commander and said I’ve got two people in a sanpan and they are headed right towards our stern what are your orders. He said how far are they from you? I said about 25 yards away. He said are you sure? Are you sure? What does it look like? It's just two people I don't know who they are, what do I do? I am standing on top of the very mast of the boat. I am sitting up there and I have my M-16 trained on the boat now, as it is getting closer I train my M-16 on the boat, I got it cocked and ready to go, and the commander says open fire open fire. In the middle of the night about 2:10 in the morning. For the first time in my life I would look at someone in their face. They were about 15 yards away from me. Not with a machine gun or a 50 caliber. It one thing to kill somebody with a big cannon and you don't see them. You are killing them but you don’t see them. But it s a completely different story when you see people sitting in a boat innocently coming towards you. I aimed that M-16 at them and aimed and I never fired. The boat got past me and over about seven or eight boats down from us they pulled the little sanpan over. They stopped it; they flashed the lights at it and pulled them over. They didn't kill them either. They just stopped them. Turns out that these old people, these old, old people, grandma and grandpa, they were just running away from the enemy. Trying to move to a safe place. Had I shot them I would have been living with that for the rest of my life. I would have shot them in cold blood because they didn’t have any weapons. All they had were their clothes and some food to get them where they were going. They were just going one place to another. Those grandma and grandpa I will never forget that I didn’t fire. I got a real bad scolding for that. I remember the lieutenant came and he gave me a chewing out. He said next time I give you an order, you know what you are lucky that these people did not have bomb, or that they weren't mined, that they didn't just crash into your boat, and kill your whole crew. Had they had a gun or a grenade they could have just tossed it up on the boat and killed you or your friends. You don't know who they are, that is why I gave you an order to kill them, to shoot. You don’t disobey orders. I got a chewing out but to this day I thank God that I didn't kill them, because had I killed them and then found out that they were two old innocent people, I would probably be going out of my mind.
Did your attitude or views on life change after the war? How?
My attitude changed tremendously in a bad way, because I came back from Vietnam knowing now a whole lot about life and having been so close to death, I felt like I should have come home and been given a good job right away. I wasn't. When I came home I struggled for many months, in fact for almost two years I struggled to get a good job. I worked at a convenience store, I worked as a gardener, I worked delivering fish, I delivered candy and milk, I worked as a fork lift operator. The reason I had all these jobs was because my attitude was so bad when I got back I didn’t take orders well. If people started to raise their voice or use bad profanity, bad language towards me or yell at me, I would immediately cut them off and say I don’t have to put up with this. This is why I got out of the Navy cause I didn’t want people yelling at me. I went and fought for my county and I don't deserve for you to be talking to me like that. I would get fired, people were afraid of me, instead of contending with me they would just say you are fired and I would have to go look for another job. But as you already wrote down I didn't spend much time, I only spent one time spent 30 days without a job. All the other times I only went one or two days sometimes the same day I would stop and get a job. My attitude was bad.
How has the war impacted you life?
Well like I said it has impacted my life in many ways, economically, politically. Economically because the government is helping to sustain me financially, I get medical treatment any time I need it in the Veterans Administration, I get my glasses, my dental, my shoes there, anything I want. I get compensated for my wounds. So economically they have taken care of me. And politically it has opened my eyes to politics and government. That sometimes politicians because of their greed and their stinginess for money, oil or other natural resources that they want from another country, or even another country possibly they would like to obtain their land. Here in Vietnam, I believe that the steel industry had a big part to do with Vietnam. because if you know when you have a war you have steel workers going to work to make bombs, shells, casings, guns, the steels workers, and everybody is working. The economy is booming. Everybody is going to work because you have to supply the military with all this stuff. It behooves these big steel companies to say hey why don’t you start a war that way we can start selling more stuff to the military. It made me wiser as far as politics is concerned. The people that you put in there you want them to be honest and forget what political party they are in, but what morals do they have, what kind of agenda do they have as far as out country is concerned. Are they morally up right or just interested in money. Cause when they are interested in money and their eyes are on resources and patting somebody on the back and doing favors for companies, you are liable to wind up in a war that is unnecessary. So right now off the top of my head that is how the war in Vietnam impacted me.
Did you earn any medals?
Yes. Several medals. The National Defense Medal, the Purple Heart Medal, the Vietnam Service Medal, Republic of Vietnam Campaign Medal, Combat Action Ribbon and Navy Achievement Medal with Combat V. Those six medals.
Anything else you would like to add?
I um...I just...I don’t know who is going to see this, but I hope that I didn't offend anybody on my boat crew. I am sorry to those who I failed. I was very young, and afraid. I am sorry if I failed them in any way. As an older man I sometimes wish I could go back and do some of the things I didn’t do. I do feel that I would have done a better job had I been older, and of course wiser. But if I did offend anybody on my boat crew I am sorry, and I wish I had done a better job as a sailor.
I leaned a great deal from this interview. I learned that my Uncle Ruben has shrapnel in his back and chest. I also learned that he has diabetes because of Agent Orange that they sprayed over the jungles in Vietnam. Also that he has six medals from the war. Some important points in the interview was when he told me some of the things from the war that changed his life. I verified the story he told me about how his ship was hit the most with a report online. Some of the benefits of learning about the past through oral history is that you get to see the expressions on their faces as they say it. It is one thing to read it, but another to hear it told to you and see the look of pain or guilt or anger on their face. I guess you might say that a disadvantage of doing oral history is that you can be blinded by the emotional aspect of it. You can become so emotionaly involved in it that you do now see the whole truth of it, just what they tell you. Overall I would have to say that this is an effective way of learning about history. You feel more connected to it then just reading it in a book.
San Antonio, Texas a link about San Antonio.
Vietnam war a link to the history channel about the vietnam war.
Vietnam a link about vietnam.
Operations a link to a report on some operations that they went on.
Report a link to a report confirming what my uncle said about his boat being hit the most out of the whole squadron.
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